my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
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