Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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