I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Sacagawea was the original milf.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Can you bring me the toilet please
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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