hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize