Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize