nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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