if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize