quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize