Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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