maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
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Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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