"it" just moved
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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