You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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