she was so not down for the gang bang
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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