I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
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