2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize