PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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