i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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