I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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