I'm lost and stupid without you.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I smell like Dick and happiness
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize