I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize