Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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