When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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