And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize