bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
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