people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
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