Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
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