Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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