I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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