You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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