So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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