The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize