So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
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the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
you had me at cake vodka
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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