I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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