he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Randomize