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my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
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