my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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