Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I just want to make out with him forever
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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