My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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