on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
People in love make me want to vomit
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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