He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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