It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
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