Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Randomize