yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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