k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
bring money and cleavage
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize