Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize