I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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