Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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