you guys were way drunker than both of me
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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