Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
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