I accidentally had phone sex last night
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
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3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
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The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
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